Competitive team sports can help children learn about teamwork and goal setting, and are beneficial to children’s self-esteem.
However, there is an unhealthy side to sports competition that puts pressure on children and takes the fun out of the game. Unhealthy competition focuses on winning and being better than others at all costs.
You can promote healthy sports competition in children by:
Be a role model. Are you the parent yelling from the bench or are you facing the referees? If you want to yell at a game, make sure he’s encouraging and sporty: “Nice move” or “Way to go!”
Focusing on the positives. On the way home from a game, discuss what your child did right, not what he did wrong or who won or lost.
Avoiding comparisons. Comparing your child to the team’s star player to improve his game will make him feel inferior. Also avoid telling your child that she did better than someone else to boost her ego.
Listening to your son. Organized team sports are not for everyone. Let your child choose the activity that he will enjoy the most.
Wolfgang Schädler, who has been the head coach of the US National Luge Team since 1986, and will be back at the 2010 Winter Olympics, perfectly sums up the sporting competition: “Victory is not defined by wins or losses. It’s defined by effort. If you can honestly say, ‘I did my best, I gave it my all,’ then you’re a winner.”